Coronavirus - A Pooh Story

* Borrowed and enhanced from a Facebook post ...

"Where are we going Piglet?" asked Pooh.

"We need to get supplies," said Piglet. "For the Coronavirus".

"Ahh," said Pooh, nodding in understanding. "Things like gloves, water, toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and medicated shampoos even though we don't have hair?"

Piglet did a little grunty sort of laugh, and a happy leap and bit of a cough. 

"No," said Piglet. "No, those aren't the supplies we need at all!"

"What we need are huge bags of pretzels, cashews, jellies, and chocolates; a freezer full of fry-ables and microwave pizzas, and all the Champagne that we can possibly carry".

"We need lightly salted crackers and cheeses like Brie and Comte as well as something smelly. Salami, Parma Ham, Spanish Jamon, and fresh olives."

"You of course, Pooh, will be in charge of baguette, honey, Trappist butter ... slightly salted of course ... and kilos of corned beef. Sparkling mineral water, and some limes please".

"We shall have them deliver gallons of white wine, magnums of Burgundy, vodka in 5 liter plastic bottles for sterilization, and those salty rice crackers things in the very largest containers."
"Then, when we get quarantined we won't mind it even one bit. THOSE are supplies."

All of a sudden, Pooh thought that the idea of coronavirus didn't seem quite so bad, and actually, getting quarantined with Piglet and their supplies really didn't sound such a terrible thing after all. 

"Oh Piglet," said Pooh. "I really do think you are a very wise animal."